it’s bad

I’ve been awake since 5. E took a 45 minute nap this morning, precluding any afternoon nap and thereby thwarting any chance I had at one, too. I can’t function without sleep. Consistent, real sleep. With REM and everything. This ain’t cuttin’ it. I’ve got to keep them awake until 7pm tonight (another two hours) and then we can all go to sleep.

little grown up

Today is K’s second Kindermusik class. Normally her father takes her but he’s out of town today. The teacher and I have made arrangements for K to be there without a parent; K will just “help” the teacher today, as it would be difficult for me to be her parent in the class with E wandering around. I get both of the children out of the car at church to take her into the class. She just walks right in the building and says over her shoulder, “I’ll be ok, Mom” before I even have a chance to walk with her down the hallway. She has to walk down several halls around corners and into a far away part of the building. Naturally, I follow her all the way into the building and down to the classroom, but she could have done it all by herself. She is not afraid, nor is she even slightly hesitant. This is not my child with separation issues.

broken

I broke one of my tiny Cambodian dishes today. I was washing it out, and it slipped out of my hand and crashed into the ceramic kitchen sink we have in this house. I just kept saying no, no, no, no, no. I have a bunch of these little dishes that I brought back on one of my many trips back to the US from there. I love these little blue and white pottery dishes. Some are deep, and others are shallow. I broke a deep one. They don’t hold much – maybe a few tablespoons full of something in the shallow ones and a fourth of a cup of something in the deep ones. We used them for fish sauce or soy sauce in Phnom Penh. I use them for all sorts of things here — setting out pills or vitamins, water for painting with watercolors, mixing cinnamon into butter. The one I broke I had been using for pouring liquid medicine into so I could get it up into the plunger to give to E. I like having all the little dishes here with me, reminding me of my time in Cambodia. I’ve seen other little blue and white pottery in some Asian shops or some pottery outlets, but I really can’t find these exact dishes here. And it’s not like I’m going to be headed out to Psar Thmei or Tuol Thom Pong anytime soon. It makes me sad to have broken one of my reminders of that other “home.”